itty bitty.

tonight as i drove home from dropping my friend off, i was stopped by a train. i was the only person on the road at the moment and i could have easily beaten the train, feeling dangerous(i did that last night at the same insersection and almost got crushed by the bars, but dont tell anyone), but i kind of wanted to take my time and instead just sit there for few minutes. while sitting there listening to kelly clarkson(it was conveniently on fm 100), i saw flashing ambulance lights coming up from behind me. and of course, although emergency vehicles are pretty boss on the roads, they cant go through a train. so they had to just sit there with the lights flashing. i couldnt help but wonder who may be suffering right now. who is possibly dying. and this stupid train HAD to pass THIS intersection RIGHT now. i wish i had the power to stop the train, separate it, and let the ambulance pass through. but i couldnt. so i prayed. all i could do was pray for this person out there who was suffering more and more as the moments passed. i couldnt help but think that this train, at this very moment, was keeping someone from breathing, was killing someone. maybe. even the possibility of this frightened me. it felt like such a long train. relief collected in my heart when i heard the cuboose coming. and once those bars lifted like race flags, i yelled. "GO! GO! GET EM!" i stayed there until the truck sped off into the distance feeling small and powerless, but yet feeling meant for this. i think this person needed my prayers. i like to think i touched someone. somewhere. and if i didnt, well i dont know. maybe i touched myself. learned something from this in a way. "prayer is powerful". "the power of prayer"- so commonly stated among christians, but it is completely true. i need to pray more. im tired of selfish prayers. i think that is what i have learned from this. i need to pray for everyone, not just my itty bitty self.
-shel